I was having a bad day. Actually, I was having a few bad days in a row. A business deal didn't go as planned and my expectations weren't met. When you invest your time, energy and resources into a project and it doesn't turn out the way you thought it would, it is easy to be disappointed. The words, "expectation breeds disappointment" couldn't seem more true. I try not to take things too personally, but in seeking a resolution, I felt mishandled and mistreated and that compounded my feelings of frustration.
I was brooding over my hurt feelings, when I saw a lily. I took a moment to admire the vibrant colors and patterns. While I was looking at the lily and the surrounding flowers, the heady smell of the garden hit me. I felt drunk on the color and the sticky sweet perfume. After the moment passed, I tried to think about what I was so mad about. Suddenly, it didn't seem so important. Those feelings that seemed oh so big only minutes before didn't seem so monumental after all. They became insubstantial things, trivial things. Things that are here one minute and are gone the next. So what if I didn't make as much money as I thought I would or didn't get treated the way I wanted. I could waste time burning with fury, destroying my peace of mind... or I could make something. I could make something that would be tempered with the wisdom of past mistakes and grows from self-knowledge. I could make something beautiful where there were only ugly thoughts and feelings. It's not so much about letting go as deciding what's more important and allowing that to rule the day. Who has time time to waste, when one could be considering the flowers?
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4 comments:
Very wise! Thank you for that, Andrew.
Hi Andrew - just wanted to let you know you have a big fan here in Lexington, Va. I"m a professor who beads part-time as a way to help support my disabled granddaughter - and to meditate, relax, and feel creative! I found your blog by chance last year and have been following ever since. Your ideas and productivity blow me away every time you post. I look forward to your new pieces and drool over them unabashedly! Thank you for putting so much beauty into this broken world.
A substantial behaviour we should all try to remember and emmulate. Thank you for reminding us to smell the flowers.
I am so glad that the flower caught your attention and was instrumental in refocusing your thoughts. I am going to have my 11- and 13- year olds read this post. It is a valuable lesson in dealing with disappointment. At times, we can all let our disappointments overwhelm us, but we all need to keep things in perspective, not dwell on it for too long and not let it prevent us from seeing the next opportunity that may be right in front of us if we refocus. Happy that you are feeling better!
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