A Song for Small Things...

"One.  Two.  Three.  Breathe."  Those are the words I said as I sat down to write this post.  In the six years that I've had this blog, this is perhaps the most sporadic that I've updated.  Usually I post on a daily basis... sometimes even more!  But lately I've had a hard time connecting to this medium.  It's not for lack of things to say or because I don't want to do it.  I do.  But it has been difficult summoning up the mental fortitude to sit down and write and express my thoughts in this digital forum.

In the past few weeks, I've received dozens of emails and messages from concerned readers, asking how I am and if everything is okay.  After going back and reading the last couple of entries, spaced a week apart at a time with the occasional insubstantial filler speckled in between, I can see how my "phoning it in" could be cause for alarm.

But I am fine.  Actually, I am better than fine.  Small things have been shifting.  They are not the things one marks their life by or even particularly notice much, but the subtle changes are starting to move the pieces into place.  The puzzle is revealed to be a doorway to an unfamiliar path.  I find myself in new territory.

And maybe that's why I haven't been writing as much.  It's hard to sing confidently when you're just learning the words to a new song.  You can hum along – surprisingly well at times even – but until you've  taken time to really get to know the new material, it still doesn't sound quite right.

So in my time away, I've been familiarizing myself with this new tune.  I have been adjusting and harmonizing.  I've been singing in the mirror when no one has been looking.  And frankly, I'm excited by all the new prospects that lie ahead.

I'm liking this new song.