Monday, October 12, 2009

Rocket Ship Days...

Some days are what I like to call, "Rocket Ship Days." You just want to pack everything up, or at least the important things, climb into your rocket ship, blast off, and never look back. The only comfort is solitude and what a sweet comfort that is.

I've been on an emotional roller-coaster lately. Lots of highs... lots of lows. I know the only salve is quiet time to reflect, readjust, and reenergize.

The thing that triggered this whole downward spiral was such a stupid thing. We were out going to the Frick, exploring the Brooklyn Flea under the Brooklyn Bridge and looking around the Farmers' Market... that's when one of my guests made a nasty comment. I could understand if the comment was constructive or offered solution or alternative, but it was just basically bitching to bitch. A flip switched in my head and I was awash with annoyance. I did, after all, have other things that I could be doing rather than showing someone around who is clearly not having a good time and is not pleased with how I'm showing them around. The person tried to blame their poor behavior on low blood sugar, but who gets low blood sugar after eating a sticky almond pastry? I struggled with myself and what I felt obligated to do to be a good host and be as hospitable as possible, but it was a losing battle and I finally just said, "You guys can do whatever you want. I'm going home to take a nap. I'm cranky." Maybe it's my fault for being too sensitive or expecting guests to conduct themselves in a certain way or that I'm too self-policing... all I know is that it put me in a rank mood.

So, I climbed into my rocket ship, which was actually my bed and slept it off. I had all kinds of dreams, crazy and bizarre, and I feel as though a poison has been flushed from my system. It wasn't a cure-all, for sure, but I do feel better and a little more clear. Perhaps this means the rocket ship is coming in for a landing?

14 comments:

mairedodd said...

really sorry to hear about your guest... there is no excuse for rude behavior and to write it off to low blood sugar only makes it worse... i am always blown away by how easy it is for some people to be unkind... you certainly didn't deserve that after giving thought and time to a visit... seriously, the frick & your other activities? you strike me as a tolerant person... where's there any room for complaint?
so glad that the rocket bed worked for you... don't be so hard on yourself... i have been needing some quiet time lately and just cannot get it... it leaves me feeling a bit edgy... and what a great word you use for it 'salve', that's perfect...

Lynn said...

...reminds me of all the time I used to spend daydreaming about turning all my funds into cash, tossing cash & cat into car and driving into the sunset. No forwarding info, no notice to anyone, just...gone. Away, far, far away!

Adventures with Millie Making Jewelry said...

I've found that some people are just unhappy and it really isn't a reflection on you or me. That doesn't excuse them for being rude, but knowing that helps me to understand the situation better. Be good to yourself!

heatherwynn said...

I'm sending a big warm hug to you dear friend.

kate mckinnon said...

I always want to run away, pretty much every other day, and, like you, I am blessed with family and friends who understand, and let me go. You'll love them all again tomorrow, or the day after that.

Love to you,
Kate

Melissa J. Lee said...

Who says we have to get along with one another, all of the time? If I didn't have at least a little solitude each day (even if it's at 2am in the morning), I would go completely mad. I hope you're feeling better.

AJ said...

I've been in that situation before. I had a *very* negative house guest earlier this year, and it was all I could do to bite my tongue for the entire visit to stop myself from starting something.

I'm so glad you were able to escape the bad situation and get some rest. Entertaining guests is exhausting even when they're pleasent.

Azure Islands Designs said...

Sorry you had such a negative experience when trying to show friends a great time!!! I know I would have loved it! As said before some people just can't be pleased no matter what you do...I have two family members like that and it can be very trying sometimes!!!

I think we all need the "rocket ship" from time to time!!!!

Cheers

Alice said...

These sort of people are selfish and have closed minds. Don't feel bad for leaving 'The Selfish' to their own devices. No one deserves to have their day ruined by rude behaviour, especially when they are taking time out of their own busy schedule to entertain 'The Selfish'.

I hope you are refreshed today!

jennifer said...

In Paris of all places (who fights in Paris?) my travel companion (one of my dearest friends) and I squabbled six times in two days, nearly making each other cry at least twice.
And then we burst out laughing about the fact that we are perfectly compatible in London but not in Paris for some reason. Go figure.

Hope it works out!

nina said...

andrew, when i read that your guest was blaming rudeness on low blood sugar, i actually said out loud, OH PLEEEASE. this is precisely what my landlord said to me when she came down and saw the broken glass from the robbery everywhere, when i said i had to go unpack my car. she left me there, because her blood sugar was low (right after a yoga class, i might add) and that she had to go home and eat. i was left to unpack my car, sweep up dozens of dustpans of glass, and try to make myself feel comforted - sometimes a hard thing to do. you were VERY right in detaching so that you could go get some rest; i commend you for not snapping some ugly comments out loud to them. i would have done that - you are far more mature at 25 than i am at 53, dear one. be kind to yourself during this time of transition....xo

Jennifer said...

Glad I behaved better :P I slept for 11 1/2 hours on Monday night. I felt amazing today.Sadly I have a cough though. Hmmmm, maybe a good excuse to sleep some more. Ciao friend.

Janet said...

I think Id of handled it just as you did!

P said...

Naps are good :)